Sure, we’ve been quiet for a while – it happens. Sometimes, we’re busy doing nothing at all and are just lazy.

Other times, we might be revamping our entire relationship with food.

…Ok, that doesn’t happen that often, but this time (for me) – that’s exactly what I’m doing.

I grew up eating macaroni & cheese every night (straight . . . → Read More: The Impossible May Have Happened]]>

Sure, we’ve been quiet for a while – it happens. Sometimes, we’re busy doing nothing at all and are just lazy.

Other times, we might be revamping our entire relationship with food.

…Ok, that doesn’t happen that often, but this time (for me) – that’s exactly what I’m doing.

I grew up eating macaroni & cheese every night (straight out of the pot) while my single father grilled himself up a steak and peas as we set up the television for a feasting session every night. For one of my birthdays, I received a Costco pack of the good ol’ mac’n'cheese which should be an indication of my nutritional education during my youth. My mother has always been calorie/body conscious and likely shook her head in disappointment every time my little mouth spouted off “what I’ve eaten at Dad’s place.” My father could eat pork, fried chicken, and NutterButters every night for the rest of his life and be the happiest camper in the park.

This lifestyle – combined with my love for computer-playing and television-watching – gave me ample experience in the world of childhood obesity. I’ve been overweight my entire life. Not just overweight, but very unhealthy. While I played lots of sports and went quite far in my athletic career, I was almost always the biggest girl on whichever team I was on. Despite the fact that I’ve ditched my bathroom scale for good, I know that I am still quite overweight.

Once upon a time, I had a step-mother who convinced me that I would have more friends and be more popular if I were thinner, and was quick to put my 11 year old self onto the Atkins diet. I know, right? Needless to say, I lost weight, but as soon as I deviated from the no-carb lifestyle, I packed it all back on. Then, in my late teens, I gave a go to South Beach diet. Then, the cabbage soup diet (lordy, the embarrassment accompanying this text is palpable). I was so fixated on losing weight and “getting thin” that I would try anything.

Then, upon moving to Chicago in 2008, I actually lost weight when I didn’t intend to. How? Through the time-tested method of being dirt poor and not having a car. I ate Top Ramen and frozen burritos – lost about thirty pounds. Wow. Really? Yes, really. I kept it off for a while before moving back to Seattle in August of this year. I lived in my car, as previously mentioned, and had no kitchen of my own. Do you  know what that produces? Pounds back on, that’s what. I gained a bit of the weight back, for sure.

I’m exhausted, as this point. I’m no longer living in my car, and I have a kitchen – but dude, I am exhausted. I’m in a shit mood most of the time, and my energy level is low, low, low. But I have everything I want – what is the deal?

A couple nights ago, I was surfing Netflix Instant – as I am wont to do – and stumbled upon a film called Foodmatters. I am a sucker for food show of any kind, so this was an immediate play as I sat in bed with my boyfriend. The show illustrated how off-kilter our culture is – allotting our largest dollar amounts to cars, homes, and luxuries… Completely ignoring our bodies – you know, that part of life where the life comes from. That was a major “duh” moment for me. They continued to talk about how processed foods affect our bodies and how the medical industry promotes “a pill for every ill” and touts that “too much [vitamins] can make you sick – be careful!” They had experts from every industry speak on it – food, agriculture, nutrition, medicine… Something clicked.

While no diets were being promoted or especially waxed upon, talk of superfoods and vitamin supplements caught my attention. The raw foodist’s words caught my attention. The organic farmer’s words caught my attention.

The next morning, my boyfriend and I decided we were going to try going raw.

Not 100% raw, mind you – I will never give up pizza. But every person in that program mentioned that at least a 51% raw diet not only helps your body function, but it helps your mind function. What more can you really ask for? We went to our local used book store and purchased Raw Food Life Force Energy by nutritionist Natalia Rose. While the book’s focus on “lose so much weight!”, “be gorgeous!”, “youthful appearance forever!!” really rubs my TD button the wrong way, the food-related and body-related information contained within… just makes sense.

I’m excited to start this new path and have a place to share how it’s affecting my brain and body – I think it’s going to be pretty major. I’d love to hear from any raw food purveyors or anyone who has seen Foodmatters- leave a comment!

As my body continues to tell me that it’s completely uninterested in chicken, I’ve been looking for other ways to make my meals feel balanced.

Today I went to the grocery store.  I rarely do because I use Amazon Fresh (god, do I love Amazon Fresh) but when I have to, I get…distracted.  Annie’s Mac ‘n’ Cheese, . . . → Read More: Toasted]]>

As my body continues to tell me that it’s completely uninterested in chicken, I’ve been looking for other ways to make my meals feel balanced.

Today I went to the grocery store.  I rarely do because I use Amazon Fresh (god, do I love Amazon Fresh) but when I have to, I get…distracted.  Annie’s Mac ‘n’ Cheese, cookies, crackers: it’s a lot of snack food and very little that can actually be used to create a respectable meal.

This time, though, I was focused: crimini mushrooms, a bunch of kale, some heavy cream and Buitoni Mixed Cheese Tortellini.  And cookies.

And this is what came about.

It’s an altered version of Family Friendly Food’s Wild Mushroom Ravioli with Kale and Cream.  I skipped the tomatoes – the boyfriend likes them, but I can’t stand them – and added some toasted almonds for extra “good fats” and protein.  What I didn’t expect was the added flavor: those almonds were epic.

I used to hate mushrooms, so I was worried.  Sauteing them in butter lifted my spirits.  Even the boyfriend was surprised: “Something smells good.  What is that?”

“Mushrooms and butter!”

“Really? Mushrooms? You?”

The cheese tortellini didn’t hurt either.

Kale!  It’s some kind of super food, with tons of protein, Vitamin E, iron, dietary fiber, and a ton of vitamins.  It’s also a winter food, which means I’m going to be using a lot more of it in the next few months.

This is just before I stirred in the kale and sprinkled the whole thing with those toasted almonds and parmesan.  I had no idea that toasted almonds were so easy: chop them up, throw them in a pan on low, and let them heat.  That’s it!

You must, must, must check out Family Friendly Food.  Her Wild Mushroom Ravioli with Kale and Cream isn’t the only amazing recipe.  Now that I’ve started to get the hang of cooking from scratch (mostly scratch) I feel better about cooking more of her recipes!

Removing meat from one’s diet is kind of like being in love.

Hear me out.

I subscribe to the belief that every morning, when I wake up, I make the decision to stay with my partner.  I make the decision to continue to love him, and do his laundry, and play video games with him.  (Okay, maybe not . . . → Read More: Sausage Fest]]>

Removing meat from one’s diet is kind of like being in love.

Hear me out.

I subscribe to the belief that every morning, when I wake up, I make the decision to stay with my partner.  I make the decision to continue to love him, and do his laundry, and play video games with him.  (Okay, maybe not so much the video games.  He wishes I’d play more.)  It’s a small decision, but making it every day matters.  It strengthens my conviction and reminds me of the gravity of my actions.  It helps me remember to consent to video games more often, because small choices are, in the end, all it’s really about.

So this morning, when I was hungry at 10AM and wishing I’d had a bigger breakfast, I went to my building cafeteria to pick up some food.  I needed protein – I could feel it.  The sausage looked so delicious.

So delicious.

But I got a spinach and olive omelet instead.

It’s a small choice, I know, to avoid a side of animal product with my animal by-product meal, but it’s based around the conscious decision that I make every day to cut just a little more meat out of my diet, and replace it with vegetables and legumes.  And I kind of like that.

So yes, vegetarian choices are like love.  And video games.  Sometimes you’ve got to sacrifice what looks good for what can be sustained.

Not just two posts in a row, but two meals in a row that I didn’t completely mess up with 1/2 lbs. of melted cheese or something.

Lunch was almost an entire bag of orange chicken (so delicious – might be dinner), but instead was this:

JEALOUS? You should be, because this is the best salad ever.

Dinner is so frustrating.

It’s this up-and-down thing, where I do well, and then I suck.  Sometimes in the same night.

Examples:

Wednesday: an entire box of Annie’s Shells & White Cheddar.  Ahem.

Thursday: a small serving of chicken tortellini with red sauce, and only a sprinkling of Parmesan.  Good job!

. . . → Read More: Scaling Down, Scaling Up]]>

Dinner is so frustrating.

It’s this up-and-down thing, where I do well, and then I suck.  Sometimes in the same night.

Examples:

Wednesday: an entire box of Annie’s Shells & White Cheddar.  Ahem.

Thursday: a small serving of chicken tortellini with red sauce, and only a sprinkling of Parmesan.  Good job!

Friday: a cheese-and-salsa quesadilla.  Fail.

Saturday: beer and bratwurst.  It was an Oktoberfest party, and I only had ONE brat (and not one with veal in it).  And three beers.  Oh.  And chips.  And some cheese.

Crap.

Sunday: black bean and feta tacos.  So amazing. So a delicious vegetarian source of protein.  So from this website.

Monday: Pasta…and vegetables!  And you didn’t need an army of cheeses to enjoy it!  Good job Jen!

Tuesday: QFC rotisserie chicken and garlic mashed potatoes.  An actual serving.  Not too much.

…

…and then I ate some Captain Crunch out of the box.  WTF. (PS: they’re not a fruit, in case you’re wondering.)

So, obviously, I have a problem with complex carbohydrates. Maybe instead of worrying about removing cheese and meat from my diet, I should focus on incorporating veggies into almost every meal.

Speaking of which:

+

=

Chicken with steamed veggies and potatoes for lunch.  Which is easy, because I’m really health-conscious at lunch.

Now if only I could keep myself out of the pantry after dinner.

Good afternoon from beautiful Queen Anne.

I’m housesitting for my sister, as well as taking care of her kitties. This is great for several reasons:

1. Remember how I’m homeless? 2. ANTM Marathon Wednesdays have gone uninterrupted. 3. I get to, you know, cook for myself which means I eat more than pre-packaged crap! Very exciting.

As a direct product of . . . → Read More: Starting to “get” it?]]>

Good afternoon from beautiful Queen Anne.

I’m housesitting for my sister, as well as taking care of her kitties. This is great for several reasons:

1. Remember how I’m homeless?
2. ANTM Marathon Wednesdays have gone uninterrupted.
3. I get to, you know, cook for myself which means I eat more than pre-packaged crap! Very exciting.

As a direct product of the above, this morning started off perfectly with a cup of coffee and email-checking while looking out at Elliot Bay and the train yard.

Gorgeous! After my first cup of coffee, I ate breakfast (and before 10:30am – I know!).

Last night, my boyfriend and I had some appetizer-y foods involving some fresh mozzarella, basil, tomatoes and a sourdough baguette. This morning was “leftovers” that I threw into the broiler for a minute, accompanied by some apples and amazing Valencia peanut butter (with flax seeds!).

It was amazing. However, now it’s 12:08 and I’m snacking on almonds… Because I’m hungry! Already! What gives!

Lunch plans include spinach, a chicken patty thing, and tomatoes. Can you guess what it is?

I’m eating a garlic cheddar burger.

But this morning I ate oatmeal!  With dried fruit!  And last night I was a rockstar at portion control, going for half a bowl of chicken tortellini and red sauce, with only a sprinkling of Parmesan (instead of a quarter cup)!  And tonight I’m going to eat…something healthy!  And maybe vegetarian!  . . . → Read More: How Now, Brown Cow]]>

I’m eating a garlic cheddar burger.

But this morning I ate oatmeal!  With dried fruit!  And last night I was a rockstar at portion control, going for half a bowl of chicken tortellini and red sauce, with only a sprinkling of Parmesan (instead of a quarter cup)!  And tonight I’m going to eat…something healthy!  And maybe vegetarian!  I’m being healthy, really!

I asked two employees at my building’s cafeteria about the source of their meat products – “natural country beef” doesn’t mean a whole lot – but they weren’t sure.  They recommended I talk to a specific person, who I’m going to seek out on Monday.

Image via WhyFiles.org.

Also, I swear to god I’ve been taking pictures.  I just don’t remember to upload them.  I have this awesome comparison between my Wednesday and Thursday dinners, but it will have to wait until…Friday dinner?  Why yes, that’s it.

Did I mention that I’m sick? Because I am. And it’s making it really hard to know what my body wants. Between coughs and sneezes, I feel like I want to eat an entire cow, an entire bag of pasta, and three cans of soup. I’m trying to avoid dairy for mucous-related (entirely too pleasant, that . . . → Read More: But there’s, like… no cheese…?]]>

Did I mention that I’m sick? Because I am. And it’s making it really hard to know what my body wants. Between coughs and sneezes, I feel like I want to eat an entire cow, an entire bag of pasta, and three cans of soup. I’m trying to avoid dairy for mucous-related (entirely too pleasant, that thought) reasons… But that… means… no… cheese? I don’t understand.

So lunch was chili. I’ve been looking forward to my Trader Joe’s Turkey Chili for like three days. It’s my favorite chili they make (the chicken is good, too… Wait, maybe it’s the chicken I love and the turkey was an ok substitute…?), but today it was just so-so. Why? No 5 lbs. of melted cheddar on top. I could have cried.

I made another slice of toast (Trader Joe’s Whole Wheat Sourdough I Don’t Know Why I’m Capitalizing Everything), but this time, wiped some butter (literally, with the stick) across the top and doused it in garlic powder – it’s one of my favorite soup/chili/red sauce accompaniments. Also? A massive salad (half a romaine heart with one and a half tomatoes).

I lied a little bit with the “no cheese” claim, because on both, I sprinkled a little grated Parmesan on both the salad and the chili. I know, I know.

I also decided to try some of that crazy spray dressing, as I seem to over-dress my salads, typically. I used to know a girl named Jovana who only put salt, pepper and garlic salt on her salads… But I can’t. I love dressing too much. So this spritz stuff was a potential lifesaver.

2 calories per spray, it says! Ok. I probably sprayed like 15 times (one for each bite, I guess) so that’s pretty good. It’s allegedly “ranch”, but it wasn’t terribly ranch-y. It’s hard to duplicate the creaminess of ranch when you’re literally spraying a stream of it onto lettuce. I’d probably do it again, it was easy and dare I say – fun.

This was a pretty mega-tastic lunch, so I’ll probably try to convince the boyfriend to have a lighter dinner. Of. Something. No idea yet.

Back to insane amounts of tea. (Inhaling Traditional Medicinals Gypsy Cold Care - feels amazing but takes too long to make! I don’t like waiting 15 minutes for my damned tea bag to steep, ok?)

Oh, and on the water front: it’s been 4 hours and I’ve gone through… 3/4 of my bottle. Bad Lindsay.

So, over the last day, I’ve been trying to examine my relationship with food a little more closely. Namely:

That was… revealing. Here are some [ridiculous] things I discovered:

I don’t believe that coffee and food should go together. Well, espresso and food . . . → Read More: Brain Functions & Break…fast?]]>

So, over the last day, I’ve been trying to examine my relationship with food a little more closely. Namely:

• When I eat
• How I’m feeling when I get hungry
• What I crave
• What I actually end up eating

That was… revealing. Here are some [ridiculous] things I discovered:

I don’t believe that coffee and food should go together. Well, espresso and food should not go together. Because of the nutritional contents of a soy latte, I figure it is adequate as a meal-replacement. This is… not… so… good. According to this site, there are 202 calories, 6.5g of fat, 36g carbs, and 9g of protein (!!) in my mocha. While that’s a lot of nutritional content for a morning coffee, it is not a meal. That is not an adequate 9am-1pm hold-over.

When I do feel hungry (which, I’ve read, is usually a sign that you’ve waited too long to eat), about 50% of the time, I remember that I want to eat healthy. The other 50% of the time, I grab whatever is convenient. The healthy 50% usually results in me sifting through the refrigerator, getting annoyed that anything I could eat will take 45 minutes of prep or simply doesn’t exist, and I end up going for, again, the most convenient food available while I try not to think about it. SO HEALTHY.

Oh, and I don’t drink NEARLY enough water.

So. This morning, I decided it would be different. At 11am, I decided that I, LINDSAY, WAS GOING TO EAT SOMETHING. After looking through the fridge at “my office”, I sourced some Trader Joe’s whole wheat sourdough (my favorite bread of all time), some Trader Joe’s whipped cream cheese (um… going to eliminate dairy soon, swear…), and some smoked salmon. Oh! And capers. VOILA. In this crazy fridge where I usually glaze over and see nothing, I found something delicious.

It was amazing. It was about 250 calories which, combined with my coffee-of-doom, equals a good breakfast. 11am is not a great time for breakfast… but it’s a start.

As for the water, my sister gave me this great water bottle (after my brand new, 40 oz., $30 Kleen Kanteen immediately dented, 2 days after I bought it), so it is officially filled and iced and ready for massive consumption.

How many bottles of water do you drink per day? Or glasses? Or whatever? I think this thing is like 20 oz. or something. I’m going to shoot for 2-3 of these per day.

Lunch will hopefully be easier. (I HAVE CANS OF THINGS.)

Last night I ate organic macaroni and cheese.  A post about that is coming – really.  I took pictures and everything.

Of boxed macaroni and cheese.

…huh.

ANYWAY.  I ate a healthy breakfast (Raisin Bran! Yum!) and opted for turkey noodle soup instead of deliciously cheesy lasagna for lunch.  (The cafeteria at my office mumbles about sustainability and local . . . → Read More: But I Have to Blog About It…]]>

Last night I ate organic macaroni and cheese.  A post about that is coming – really.  I took pictures and everything.

Of boxed macaroni and cheese.

…huh.

ANYWAY.  I ate a healthy breakfast (Raisin Bran! Yum!) and opted for turkey noodle soup instead of deliciously cheesy lasagna for lunch.  (The cafeteria at my office mumbles about sustainability and local foods relatively often, but I really do need to check up on where they get their ingredients.)  Now that my soup is finished and I’m back to work, the cravings are kicking in.

Sweets.

Images! via: FamilyofTwo, Caroekg and The Mommy Blues, respectively.

They’re so delicious, guys.  Little chocolate candies, tall vanilla lattes, gigantic chewy cookies.  And I work downtown, so there’s a veritable cornucopia of treats at my fingertips.

I was about to make a latte (because my office has an espresso machine,  I have one as an afternoon pick-me-up anyway, and what’s wrong with making it at 11:30am instead of 3pm?*) and then thought better of it.

“I have to blog about this later.”

Accountability is a bitch.  (Thanks.)

–

*Answer: A LOT, JEN.  If you make one so early in the day, especially when you’re not hungry, you’re going to want another in the afternoon.  Your pick-me-up will become a double pick-me-up, and what then?!

**Also, Lindsay and I are so Seattle it’s ridiculous.  We cannot live without our coffee.  It’s sick.